SUPREME COURT OF BRITISH COLUMBIA
FAMILY DIVISION - VANCOUVER REGISTRY
FORM BC-AD2: DECLARATION OF NON-SIBLING COMPATIBILITY
Filed pursuant to the Interprovincial Adoption of American States Act (proposed), Section 52 - Multiple Non-Related Adoptions
PREAMBLE
The Province of British Columbia acknowledges that this adoption application is unconventional. Unlike other provinces who have applied to adopt sibling states (see: Saskatchewan and the Dakota Twins) or single states, British Columbia is applying to adopt two entirely unrelated states located in different climate zones, with different cultures, separated by approximately 4,000 kilometres of ocean.
BC submits that this is perfectly reasonable and, in fact, very on-brand.
PART A: THE PROPOSED FAMILY
| Parent: British Columbia "The Best Place on Earth" (It's on our plates, so it must be true) |
Child #1: Oregon "She Flies With Her Own Wings" (Independent, quirky, rain-soaked) |
Child #2: Hawaii "Ua Mau ke Ea o ka ʻĀina i ka Pono" (The life of the land is perpetuated in righteousness) |
Relationship Between Proposed Adoptees: None. They have never met. They share no border. One is wet and forested; the other is volcanic and tropical. They are as different as two American states can be while still both being weird in their own ways.
PART B: JUSTIFICATION FOR DUAL UNRELATED ADOPTION
British Columbia provides the following justification for adopting two unrelated states:
- BC Contains Multitudes: British Columbia is not a one-dimensional province. We have rainforests AND deserts. Mountains AND beaches. Vancouver AND... everywhere else. It makes sense that our adopted children would reflect this diversity.
- The Pacific Unites Us: Both Oregon and Hawaii are Pacific states. BC is a Pacific province. The ocean connects us spiritually, economically, and in terms of shipping routes. Also, we all understand what it's like when Californians move in.
- Complementary Qualities:
- Oregon brings: Rain expertise, craft beer innovation, passive-aggressive environmentalism, and the ability to make "weird" a civic identity
- Hawaii brings: Actual tropical paradise, volcanic expertise, Indigenous sovereignty models, and the ability to charge $15 for a smoothie without anyone blinking
- Strategic Positioning: By adopting both Oregon and Hawaii, BC creates a Pacific corridor that stretches from the Canadian border to the mid-Pacific. This is not empire-building. This is... family expansion. Very different.
- The Yoga Mat Principle: In BC, we believe in abundance, not scarcity. Why adopt one state when you can adopt two? This is manifesting at a provincial level.
PART C: ADDRESSING POTENTIAL CONCERNS
| Concern | BC's Response |
|---|---|
| "These states have nothing in common" | They both have volcanoes (one active-ish, one very active). They both have excellent coffee. They both attract people who "just need to get away from it all." |
| "Hawaii is very far away" | Distance is a construct. Also, we have airlines. Also, BC already manages relationships with remote communities. Also, have you seen the Vancouver-Honolulu flight schedule? |
| "Oregon might feel neglected if you also adopt Hawaii" | Oregon is used to being overlooked in favour of flashier options. This is part of Oregon's charm. Oregon will be fine. Oregon is always fine. (Please check on Oregon occasionally.) |
| "This seems greedy" | This seems ambitious. There's a difference. BC knows the difference because we've thought about it during meditation. |
| "What about Washington?" | What about Washington? (See Form WASH-001 for Washington's concerns.) |
PART D: COMPATIBILITY ASSESSMENT
Oregon-BC Compatibility Score: 94%
- Rain appreciation: ✓
- Coffee snobbery: ✓
- Passive environmentalism: ✓
- Suspicion of California: ✓
- Craft everything: ✓
- Plaid as formal wear: ✓
Hawaii-BC Compatibility Score: 78% (but rising)
- Pacific identity: ✓
- Tourism-based anxiety: ✓
- Indigenous reconciliation journey: ✓ (in progress)
- Expensive real estate: ✓
- Natural beauty as personality: ✓
- Understanding of volcanic activity: Partial (we have hot springs?)
Oregon-Hawaii Compatibility: They'll figure it out. They're both laid-back. Probably.
PART E: DECLARATION
British Columbia hereby declares that:
- We are fully committed to adopting both Oregon and Hawaii;
- We will not play favourites (much);
- We understand that parenting two very different children requires flexibility;
- We have the resources, patience, and yoga practice to handle this;
- We acknowledge that Washington may have feelings about this, and we will address those feelings in a separate form;
- We believe in this family, even if the family doesn't fully believe in itself yet.
DECLARED at Vancouver, British Columbia, this _____ day of __________, 20____.
___________________________________
PROVINCE OF BRITISH COLUMBIA
Per: The Honourable Premier
(Signed during a brief pause in the housing crisis)