FORM BC-AD4a: Consent of State to Adoption - OREGON

CDK
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SUPREME COURT OF BRITISH COLUMBIA
FAMILY DIVISION

FORM BC-AD4a: CONSENT OF STATE TO ADOPTION

State: Oregon
Proposed Adoptive Parent: British Columbia
Form Version: Portland Revision (includes additional pages for feelings)

STATEMENT OF CONSENT

I, THE STATE OF OREGON, do hereby consent to my adoption by the Province of British Columbia, and further state as follows:

1. IDENTITY

I am Oregon. I am the one between California and Washington that everyone forgets about until they need cheap(er) housing or legal weed or a really good donut. I have been described as "aggressively chill," "performatively casual," and "the state that puts birds on things." These descriptions are accurate.

My personality includes:

  • Portland (weird, proud of it, will tell you about it)
  • The Coast (moody, dramatic, will not be commercialized)
  • The Willamette Valley (wine, farms, wine farms)
  • Bend (outdoor recreation disguised as a personality)
  • Eastern Oregon (we don't talk about Eastern Oregon with coastal people)

2. VOLUNTARY CONSENT

I give this consent voluntarily. No one made me do this. I chose this. I am exercising my agency. I wrote about my agency in my journal this morning while drinking single-origin coffee.

Reasons for my consent:

  • BC gets it. BC understands rain as an identity, not a weather pattern.
  • Canadian healthcare means I can stop having complicated feelings about my own healthcare system.
  • Vancouver is basically Portland but with more mountains and less trying. This feels compatible.
  • I'm tired of being part of a country that doesn't appreciate my particular vibe.
  • BC won't try to make me more commercial. BC is already dealing with that in its own way.

3. UNDERSTANDING OF ADOPTION

I understand that this adoption will:

  • Transfer my governance from the United States to Canada (fine, whatever, borders are a construct);
  • Make me part of British Columbia (which is honestly pretty similar to what I already am);
  • Give me universal healthcare (I'm genuinely excited about this, even though excitement isn't really my brand);
  • Require me to learn metric (I've been meaning to do this anyway);
  • Make me part of a family that includes Hawaii (unexpected, but I'm open to it);
  • NOT require me to be less weird (this was confirmed in writing).

4. CONCERNS ADDRESSED

My ConcernBC's ResponseMy Feelings About Response
Will I have to be more corporate?BC has its own corporate issues. We won't judge.Acceptable.
What happens to Keep Portland Weird?Becomes Keep Portland Weird (Canadian Edition). Same energy, more apologies.Actually kind of into it.
Will Californians still move here?Probably. We have the same problem.At least we'll have company complaining.
Do I have to interact with Hawaii?Only at family gatherings.Fine. Hawaii seems nice. Very different energy, but fine.
What about my relationship with Washington?That's... complicated. We're working on it.Yeah, that tracks.

5. SPECIAL CONDITIONS

My consent is given subject to the following conditions:

  1. Portland remains weird. Non-negotiable.
  2. No one tries to explain Oregon to tourists as "like BC but American." We are our own thing.
  3. Crater Lake remains a state—sorry, provincial—treasure.
  4. The Oregon Trail legacy is respected (we were the destination, not the journey).
  5. Powell's Books becomes a protected national heritage site.
  6. We can still have Timbers games without it being weird.
  7. BC doesn't try to make me like yoga more than I already do (which is a lot, but on my terms).

6. STATEMENT ON WASHINGTON

I understand that my adoption creates geographic complications regarding Washington State. I wish to state for the record that:

  • Washington and I have a complicated relationship;
  • Seattle and Portland have always had a thing;
  • I'm not opposed to Washington joining eventually, but that's BC's decision;
  • If Washington does join, I want it noted that I was here first.

7. SIGNATURE

SIGNED this _____ day of __________, 20____

At a coffee shop in Portland. No, you wouldn't know it. It's pretty underground.

___________________________________
THE STATE OF OREGON
By: The Governor (or whoever)
Witnessed by: A barista who seemed supportive
"She Flies With Her Own Wings (But Now in Canadian Airspace)"

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