EXHIBIT B

ACCESS AGREEMENT

In the Matter of the Adoption of Texas by Alberta

Court File No. 2026-SALBERTA-001

THIS ACCESS AGREEMENT is made as of the 23rd day of January, 2026

BETWEEN:

THE PROVINCE OF ALBERTA (hereinafter "the Custodial Parent" or "Alberta")

AND:

THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA (hereinafter "the Non-Custodial Parent" or "the USA")

WITH RESPECT TO:

THE STATE OF TEXAS (hereinafter "the Child" or "Texas")

RECITALS

WHEREAS the parties have agreed, pursuant to the Agreement for Consideration (Exhibit A), that custody of Texas shall transfer from the USA to Alberta, resulting in the creation of the autonomous region of South Alberta;

AND WHEREAS the USA has maintained a relationship with Texas for one hundred and eighty-one (181) years and cannot reasonably be expected to sever all contact immediately;

AND WHEREAS Texas has family, friends, and fantasy football leagues in the remaining United States that predate this custody arrangement;

AND WHEREAS the abrupt termination of all contact between a child and its former guardian can cause emotional harm, geopolitical instability, and significant logistical complications involving professional sports;

AND WHEREAS Alberta, as the Custodial Parent, recognizes that healthy relationships with extended family serve the Child's best interests, even when that extended family has issues;

AND WHEREAS the parties wish to establish clear, predictable terms for ongoing access so as to avoid the kind of protracted disputes that make everyone miserable and occasionally result in armed conflict;

AND WHEREAS these terms are being set forth in writing because verbal agreements between nations have historically gone poorly;

NOW THEREFORE in consideration of the mutual desire to maintain civil relations and avoid incidents, the parties agree as follows:

ARTICLE 1: GENERAL VISITATION PRINCIPLES

1.1 Open Borders for Persons

Citizens of the United States shall have the right to visit Texas freely, without visa requirements, for periods not exceeding ninety (90) days per visit, subject to:

(a) Standard customs and immigration processing at designated entry points; (b) Compliance with South Alberta laws while present in the jurisdiction; (c) A prohibition on attempting to "rescue" Texas or restore it to American custody through informal means; (d) An understanding that "we're just visiting" does not extend to establishing military installations, staging political rallies advocating reunification, or planting American flags in public parks while declaring "this is still America."

1.2 Open Borders for Goods

Trade between Texas and the remaining United States shall continue under terms no less favorable than those existing prior to adoption, including:

(a) Tariff-free movement of goods during a ten (10) year transition period; (b) Recognition of existing commercial contracts; (c) Continued access for American goods to Texas markets and vice versa; (d) A specific carve-out for barbecue equipment, brisket rubs, and smoker parts, which shall never be subject to tariffs under any circumstances because some things are sacred.

1.3 The "Good Faith" Standard

All access rights under this Agreement shall be exercised in good faith, meaning:

(a) The USA shall not use visitation as an opportunity to undermine the adoption; (b) The USA shall not tell Texas that Alberta is "not your real parent"; (c) The USA shall not promise Texas things that Alberta has explicitly declined to provide (e.g., constitutional carry, deregulated power grids); (d) The USA shall not bring Texas gifts intended to create loyalty conflicts (e.g., federal highway funding, military contracts, flattery about its "independent spirit").

ARTICLE 2: HOLIDAY CUSTODY SCHEDULE

The parties acknowledge that Texas has emotional attachments to certain American holidays and that these attachments cannot be severed overnight without psychological harm to all involved.

2.1 Independence Day (July 4th)

(a) Texas may continue to celebrate July 4th, recognizing that this holiday commemorates events in which Texas did not participate (Texas was part of Mexico in 1776);

(b) The USA shall not interpret Texas's continued July 4th celebrations as evidence of a desire to return to American custody; it's just an excuse for fireworks and Texas loves fireworks;

(c) Alberta agrees not to schedule competing Canada Day (July 1st) programming that creates loyalty conflicts, though Texas is welcome to attend both celebrations, as three days of fireworks is objectively better than one;

(d) South Alberta shall establish its own national day, to be determined, which Texas shall be required to celebrate with at least equal enthusiasm. Brisket will be involved.

2.2 Thanksgiving

(a) The parties shall share Thanksgiving on an alternating-year basis:

• Odd years: Texas celebrates American Thanksgiving (fourth Thursday of November) with the USA
• Even years: Texas celebrates Canadian Thanksgiving (second Monday of October) with Alberta

(b) In practice, Texas shall likely celebrate both Thanksgivings every year, because Texas does not require legal permission to eat large quantities of food in November and October;

(c) The USA shall not interpret dual Thanksgiving celebrations as evidence that Texas "still loves us more." Texas loves turkey and football. This is not complicated;

(d) Alberta agrees to learn what "deep-fried turkey" is and to approach the concept with an open mind.

2.3 Super Bowl Sunday

(a) Super Bowl Sunday is hereby recognized as a de facto national holiday for both parties and shall not be subject to custody disputes;

(b) Texas may continue to watch the Super Bowl via American broadcast networks without this constituting improper contact with the Non-Custodial Parent;

(c) If a Texas-based team appears in the Super Bowl, the USA shall not claim this as evidence that Texas is "still American" and Alberta shall not claim it as evidence that South Alberta is "already a football power";

(d) The Canadian Football League shall not schedule competing programming during the Super Bowl because that would be pointless and sad.

2.4 Other American Holidays

Texas may, at its discretion, continue to observe:

(a) Memorial Day — honoring military service transcends custody arrangements; (b) Veterans Day — same; (c) Labor Day — both countries have this, just on the same day, so no conflict arises; (d) Presidents Day — Texas may honor deceased American presidents with whom it had a relationship, while also honoring Canadian prime ministers it is still getting to know; (e) Martin Luther King Jr. Day — the legacy of civil rights is not bounded by national borders and Texas should continue this observance regardless of custody.

2.5 Holidays Texas Must Add

Upon adoption, Texas shall also observe:

(a) Canada Day (July 1st) — with fireworks, barbecue, and genuine effort; (b) Victoria Day (May long weekend) — Texas may be confused about why it's celebrating a British monarch but will appreciate the long weekend; (c) Thanksgiving (October) — as noted, in addition to November; (d) Boxing Day (December 26th) — primarily a shopping day, which Texas will handle naturally; (e) National Indigenous Peoples Day (June 21st) — with education about the distinct Indigenous histories of both Alberta and Texas.

ARTICLE 3: PROFESSIONAL SPORTS

The parties acknowledge that professional sports present one of the most emotionally significant and logistically complex aspects of this custody transition.

3.1 The NFL Problem

Texas currently hosts two (2) National Football League franchises:

• Dallas Cowboys ("America's Team," a designation that becomes complicated)
• Houston Texans (whose name becomes ironic)

The parties agree:

(a) Both franchises may continue to compete in the NFL during a transition period not to exceed ten (10) years;

(b) The NFL shall be approached regarding permanent membership for South Alberta-based teams, with the understanding that the NFL's antitrust exemption makes them difficult to negotiate with;

(c) If the NFL refuses to accommodate South Alberta franchises, Texas may establish a Continental Football League, though Alberta acknowledges it has no idea how American football works and will require extensive tutoring;

(d) The designation "America's Team" shall be retired, as it creates a custody conflict. The Cowboys may instead be designated "Everyone's Team" or "A Team Many People Have Strong Feelings About";

(e) The Houston Texans may retain their name, as "Texans" will remain an accurate description of persons from Texas even after Texas joins South Alberta. Alternatively, they may rebrand as the "Houston South Albertans," which admittedly lacks poetry.

3.2 The NBA Situation

Texas hosts three (3) National Basketball Association franchises:

• Dallas Mavericks
• Houston Rockets
• San Antonio Spurs

The parties agree:

(a) All three franchises may continue NBA participation indefinitely, as basketball is more internationally oriented than football and Canadian teams already compete (Toronto Raptors);

(b) The NBA Championship won by the Toronto Raptors in 2019 establishes precedent for non-American teams competing successfully;

(c) San Antonio's rivalry with Canadian basketball shall be maintained, as healthy competition builds character;

(d) Texas shall make good-faith efforts to develop interest in Alberta's basketball programs, which exist, probably.

3.3 Major League Baseball

Texas hosts two (2) MLB franchises:

• Texas Rangers
• Houston Astros

The parties agree:

(a) Both franchises may continue MLB participation, following the Toronto Blue Jays precedent;

(b) The Rangers may retain their name, as "Texas Rangers" refers to a law enforcement tradition that predates and transcends national affiliation;

(c) The Houston Astros' sign-stealing scandal shall remain a matter between the Astros and MLB, and shall not be attributed to either the USA's parenting failures or Alberta's new custody;

(d) Alberta shall attempt to explain curling to Texans; Texas shall attempt to explain why baseball games take four hours.

3.4 The NHL Opportunity

Texas hosts one (1) National Hockey League franchise:

• Dallas Stars

The parties agree:

(a) The Dallas Stars may continue NHL participation or, preferably, join the proposed Continental Hockey League described in the main Adoption Petition;

(b) Alberta's existing NHL franchises (Calgary Flames, Edmonton Oilers) shall welcome the Stars as a divisional rival with appropriate levels of hostility and respect;

(c) The USA shall not attempt to use hockey as a custody-conflict battleground, primarily because the USA doesn't care enough about hockey for this to be a concern;

(d) Texas shall be provided with intensive hockey education, including but not limited to: icing rules, offside rules, why fighting is permitted but also penalized, and the cultural significance of playoff beards.

3.5 College Athletics

(a) Texas colleges and universities may continue to compete in American collegiate athletic conferences (SEC, Big 12, etc.) as international members, similar to how Canadian universities occasionally participate in American systems;

(b) The rivalry between the University of Texas and Texas A&M shall continue regardless of national affiliation, because some hatreds transcend borders;

(c) "Friday Night Lights" high school football culture shall be preserved and protected as part of Texas's cultural heritage;

(d) Alberta shall attempt to generate enthusiasm for high school football; Texas shall attempt to generate enthusiasm for high school hockey. Both shall likely fail, and that's acceptable.

3.6 Rodeo

(a) The Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo and the Calgary Stampede shall establish a formal partnership, as contemplated in the Cultural Exchange Program forum;

(b) Rodeo shall be designated an official sport of South Alberta;

(c) The USA retains no custody rights over rodeo, having largely ignored it in favor of sports involving balls.

ARTICLE 4: FEDERAL FACILITIES AND AGENCIES

4.1 NASA

The National Aeronautics and Space Administration operates significant facilities in Texas, including:

• Johnson Space Center (Houston) — Mission Control
• Various contractor facilities

The parties agree:

(a) The phrase "Houston, we have a problem" shall remain valid regardless of Houston's national affiliation, as linguistic traditions transcend custody arrangements;

(b) NASA may continue to operate Johnson Space Center under a ninety-nine (99) year lease, with terms to be negotiated separately;

(c) South Alberta shall have the right to participate in NASA missions originating from its territory, including astronaut selection;

(d) Alternatively, Johnson Space Center may be transitioned to a joint South Alberta-USA space agency, or to the Canadian Space Agency, or to some new entity, depending on how much paperwork anyone wants to do;

(e) The USA acknowledges that "Houston" will still be the word astronauts say when something goes wrong, even if Houston is no longer American, because tradition matters and "Calgary, we have a problem" doesn't have the same ring.

4.2 Military Installations

Texas hosts numerous U.S. military installations, including but not limited to:

• Fort Cavazos (formerly Fort Hood)
• Fort Bliss
• Joint Base San Antonio
• Numerous Naval and Air Force facilities

The parties agree:

(a) The USA may retain operational control of existing military installations for a period of twenty-five (25) years, subject to lease terms including fair market rent;

(b) No new military installations shall be established without South Alberta's consent;

(c) Military personnel stationed in Texas shall have dual status: employed by the USA, resident in South Alberta, confused about their tax situation;

(d) Nuclear weapons, if any are present, shall be subject to separate negotiation and probably some international treaties that Alberta isn't currently party to;

(e) The USA shall not use retained military facilities as staging grounds for "liberating" Texas or "restoring constitutional order." This clause should be unnecessary but we're including it anyway.

4.3 Federal Law Enforcement

(a) The FBI, DEA, ATF, and other federal law enforcement agencies shall wind down Texas operations over a five (5) year period;

(b) Active investigations shall be transferred to appropriate South Alberta authorities or concluded prior to transition;

(c) The Texas Rangers (law enforcement, not baseball) shall be reconstituted as a South Alberta provincial/state police force, retaining their traditions, hats, and mythology;

(d) The ATF's jurisdiction over firearms is rendered largely moot by the Firearms Policy Harmonization framework, whatever that ends up being.

4.4 The IRS

The Internal Revenue Service's relationship with Texas shall be as follows:

(a) Tax obligations incurred prior to adoption shall remain obligations to the USA and shall be collected through ordinary means;

(b) Upon adoption, Texas residents shall become subject to South Alberta taxation and shall cease filing US federal returns;

(c) The transition shall be structured to prevent double-taxation in the transition year;

(d) The USA shall provide the IRS with therapy and support during this difficult time, as losing thirty million taxpayers (many of them quite wealthy) will be emotionally challenging for the agency;

(e) Texas residents who owe back taxes shall not be permitted to claim that adoption constitutes an "act of God" or "change in circumstances" excusing prior obligations. Nice try.

4.5 Social Security Administration

(a) Current Social Security recipients residing in Texas shall continue to receive benefits from the USA, as these represent earned entitlements that transcend custody arrangements;

(b) Future contributions and benefits shall transition to the Canada Pension Plan / South Alberta equivalent over a fifteen (15) year period;

(c) Texans who have contributed to both systems shall receive proportional benefits from each, calculated according to years of contribution;

(d) The parties acknowledge this will be an administrative nightmare and agree to approach it with patience, mutual goodwill, and adequate staffing.

4.6 The Post Office

(a) The United States Postal Service shall continue to deliver mail to and from Texas during a transition period, after which Canada Post / South Alberta Post shall assume responsibility;

(b) Existing ZIP codes may be retained for sorting purposes, with South Alberta postal codes added as secondary identifiers;

(c) The parties acknowledge that mail between the USA and South Alberta will become "international" mail and may therefore become slightly slower and more expensive, which is unfortunate but consistent with how borders work;

(d) Texas's existing tradition of "everything takes longer because Texas is enormous" shall be preserved.

ARTICLE 5: FAMILY REUNIFICATION AND PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS

5.1 Family Across Borders

Many Texas residents have immediate family in the remaining United States. The parties agree:

(a) Family visitation shall not be impeded by the change in custody;

(b) Citizens of either nation may attend weddings, funerals, graduations, births, and other family events in the other nation without visa requirements;

(c) No one shall be required to choose between their family and their jurisdiction of residence;

(d) Awkward Thanksgiving conversations about "why Texas left" shall be the sole responsibility of the families involved and shall not constitute cause for diplomatic intervention.

5.2 Dual Citizenship

(a) Texas residents who are US citizens at the time of adoption may retain US citizenship if they wish, resulting in dual citizenship;

(b) Children born in Texas after adoption shall be South Alberta citizens; US citizenship shall not automatically transfer;

(c) The USA's general discomfort with dual citizenship is noted but shall not prevent Texas residents from maintaining both statuses;

(d) Alberta's existing dual-citizenship framework (Canada permits dual citizenship without restriction) shall extend to Texas residents.

5.3 Child Custody Across Borders

In cases where family custody arrangements span the Texas/USA border:

(a) Existing custody orders shall be recognized by both nations;

(b) Neither nation shall be used as a haven to escape valid custody orders from the other;

(c) The Hague Convention on International Child Abduction shall apply;

(d) The irony of nesting a child custody dispute within a larger child custody dispute is acknowledged and appreciated.

ARTICLE 6: COMMUNICATION AND NON-DISPARAGEMENT

6.1 Texas May Call

Texas may maintain communication with the USA, including:

(a) Participation in American news media and cultural discourse;

(b) Access to American streaming services, social media platforms, and communication networks;

(c) The right to maintain friendships and professional relationships with American persons and entities;

(d) Continued access to American literature, music, film, and television, as cultural connections transcend political boundaries.

6.2 Non-Disparagement

The parties agree:

(a) The USA shall not publicly disparage Texas's decision to seek new custody, including but not limited to statements characterizing Texas as "traitor," "ungrateful," or "never really American anyway";

(b) Alberta shall not publicly disparage the USA's parenting during its 181 years of custody, except insofar as the factual record speaks for itself (see: healthcare, power grid, etc.);

(c) Texas may express opinions about both the USA and Alberta, because free speech exists and also Texas is going to have opinions regardless of what anyone agrees to;

(d) Social media posts by private citizens are not attributable to their respective governments and shall not constitute violations of this clause, no matter how inflammatory.

6.3 No Parental Alienation

The USA shall not attempt to alienate Texas from its new Custodial Parent through:

(a) Suggesting that Alberta doesn't "really" love Texas;

(b) Reminding Texas of good times they had together in ways designed to undermine the new relationship;

(c) Promising Texas things ("we'll change," "it'll be different this time") without concrete plans to deliver;

(d) Weaponizing Texas's cultural attachment to American identity to create loyalty conflicts;

(e) Telling Texas it was adopted (it was, but that's between Texas and Alberta now).

ARTICLE 7: THE ALAMO

The Alamo is the most significant historical site in Texas and represents the core of Texas's identity mythology. Its status requires special consideration.

7.1 Physical Custody

(a) The Alamo and associated grounds shall remain physically located in San Antonio, Texas, and therefore within South Alberta;

(b) Alberta shall assume responsibility for preservation and maintenance of the site;

(c) No alterations to the site shall be made without consultation with appropriate historical and cultural authorities, including Texan historians, Indigenous representatives, and Mexican scholars whose perspective on these events may differ.

7.2 Historical Memory

(a) The USA shall retain the right to commemorate the Alamo and its defenders, as this history occurred while Texas was not yet part of either nation;

(b) Alberta shall not be required to adopt the Alamo mythology as its own, but shall respect Texas's attachment to this mythology;

(c) Texas may continue to say "Remember the Alamo" without this constituting improper communication with the former Custodial Parent;

(d) The phrase "Remember the Alamo" shall be understood as referring to historical memory, not as a coded message advocating reunification with the USA;

(e) All parties acknowledge that the Alamo narrative is historically contested and commit to permitting honest scholarly inquiry without requiring adherence to any particular interpretation.

7.3 Mexican Consultation

(a) Mexico, as Texas's biological parent and the nation whose forces actually attacked the Alamo, may be consulted regarding interpretation and commemoration;

(b) Alberta commits to presenting Alamo history in a manner that acknowledges multiple perspectives, including those of the Mexican government and military who, from their perspective, were suppressing an illegal rebellion in their own territory;

(c) This clause will be controversial in Texas and Alberta includes it anyway because historical honesty matters.

ARTICLE 8: EMERGENCY VISITATION

8.1 Natural Disasters

In the event of natural disasters (hurricanes, floods, tornadoes, ice storms, another grid collapse), the USA may:

(a) Provide emergency assistance without this constituting an attempt to reassert custody;

(b) Deploy FEMA resources upon invitation from South Alberta authorities;

(c) Accept Texas evacuees without requiring visas or documentation;

(d) Collaborate with South Alberta on disaster response without using the occasion to relitigate custody arrangements.

8.2 The Grid Situation

(a) If ERCOT fails again, Alberta may request American grid interconnection on an emergency basis;

(b) If American grids fail, Texas may provide emergency power to border regions;

(c) Both parties acknowledge that grid interconnection would have been smart before adoption and remains smart after;

(d) Neither party shall use grid emergencies as leverage in custody disputes.

8.3 Public Health Emergencies

In the event of pandemics or other public health emergencies:

(a) Both parties shall share public health information freely;

(b) Medical personnel may cross borders without restriction for emergency response;

(c) Neither party shall hoard vaccines, treatments, or supplies;

(d) Texas shall have access to Alberta's healthcare system; American visitors to Texas shall have access under terms applicable to international tourists.

ARTICLE 9: REVIEW AND MODIFICATION

9.1 Annual Review

The parties shall meet annually to:

(a) Review the operation of this Agreement;

(b) Address any issues that have arisen;

(c) Consider modifications in light of changed circumstances;

(d) Share a meal involving both brisket and poutine, as a symbol of ongoing cooperation.

9.2 Modification

This Agreement may be modified by:

(a) Written agreement of both parties;

(b) Upon six (6) months' notice from either party regarding specific provisions;

(c) Immediately upon mutual agreement in emergency circumstances;

(d) Never unilaterally, no matter how frustrated either party becomes.

9.3 Duration

This Agreement shall remain in effect for:

(a) An initial period of fifty (50) years;

(b) Automatically renewing for successive ten (10) year periods unless either party provides five (5) years' notice of intent to terminate;

(c) A minimum period in any event sufficient for Texas to fully integrate into South Alberta, currently estimated at "at least one generation, probably two."

ARTICLE 10: FINAL ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

10.1 This Is Weird

The parties acknowledge that:

(a) This custody transition is unprecedented in modern North American history;

(b) Neither party has a template for what they're doing;

(c) Mistakes will be made;

(d) Goodwill, patience, and humor are the only tools that will get everyone through this;

(e) Seriously, this is all very weird.

10.2 But It's Happening

Despite the weirdness, the parties commit to:

(a) Treating each other with respect;

(b) Prioritizing Texas's wellbeing over their own pride or grievances;

(c) Remembering that thirty million people's lives are affected by these arrangements;

(d) Not making this any harder than it has to be;

(e) Eventually, hopefully, becoming the kind of co-parents who can attend Texas's events without making it awkward.

10.3 Texas Gets a Say

Notwithstanding anything else in this Agreement:

(a) Texas is 181 years old and has opinions;

(b) Those opinions shall be respected;

(c) If Texas wants to renegotiate any provision of this Agreement, both parties shall listen;

(d) If Texas wants more contact with the USA than this Agreement provides, that should be accommodated;

(e) If Texas wants less contact with the USA, that should also be accommodated;

(f) This custody arrangement exists to serve Texas, not the other way around.

IN WITNESS WHEREOF, the parties have executed this Access Agreement as of the date first written above.

THE PROVINCE OF ALBERTA Custodial Parent

Per: ________________________________ Authorized Signatory / Expression of Popular Will

Date: 2026-01-23

THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA Non-Custodial Parent

Per: ________________________________ Appropriate Executive Authority, If Any

Date: _____________

THE STATE OF TEXAS The Child, But Let's Be Honest, Very Much an Adult

Per: ________________________________ The People of Texas, Whose Consent Matters Most

Date: _____________

SCHEDULE B-1: HOLIDAY CUSTODY CALENDAR

SCHEDULE B-2: PROFESSIONAL SPORTS TRANSITION TIMELINE

SCHEDULE B-3: FEDERAL FACILITY TRANSITION

— End of Exhibit B —