SUPREME COURT OF BRITISH COLUMBIA
FAMILY DIVISION
FORM BC-AD7: ADOPTION PLACEMENT AGREEMENT
Agreement for the Placement of Oregon and Hawaii with the Province of British Columbia
PARTIES TO THIS AGREEMENT
PLACING AUTHORITY: The United States of America
RECEIVING PROVINCE: The Province of British Columbia, Canada
CHILD #1: The State of Oregon
CHILD #2: The State of Hawaiʻi
OBSERVER: The State of Washington (whether invited or not)
RECITALS
WHEREAS Oregon and Hawaii have both consented to adoption by British Columbia;
WHEREAS British Columbia has demonstrated capacity to parent through Form BC-AD6;
WHEREAS these two states, though unrelated, share Pacific identity and progressive values;
WHEREAS this arrangement is unconventional but not impossible;
NOW THEREFORE, the parties agree as follows:
ARTICLE 1: DUAL PLACEMENT
1.1 The United States agrees to place both Oregon and Hawaii with British Columbia.
1.2 The placements shall occur simultaneously, symbolizing BC's commitment to both children equally.
1.3 Unlike sibling adoptions, this is a "chosen family" arrangement. Oregon and Hawaii are not required to pretend to be siblings, but are encouraged to try.
ARTICLE 2: INDIVIDUAL CONSIDERATIONS - OREGON
2.1 Geographic Integration:
- Oregon shall be physically integrated into BC through improved transportation links;
- The I-5 corridor shall become a provincial highway;
- Washington's cooperation is requested but not required (sorry, Washington);
- Portland-Vancouver (BC) flights shall be reclassified as domestic.
2.2 Cultural Preservation:
- Portland shall remain weird. This is protected by law;
- Oregon's right to pump-free gas stations shall be maintained during a transition period;
- The Oregon Trail shall be designated a National Historic Route;
- Crater Lake shall become a National Park of Canada;
- Voodoo Doughnut shall receive heritage protection.
2.3 Governance:
- Oregon shall maintain local legislative authority;
- Representation in Victoria shall be proportional to population;
- Oregon law may diverge from BC law where appropriate;
- The Timbers may continue MLS participation.
ARTICLE 3: INDIVIDUAL CONSIDERATIONS - HAWAII
3.1 Geographic Reality:
- Hawaii is 4,300 km from Vancouver. This is acknowledged and accepted;
- Regular flight service shall be maintained (minimum daily from Vancouver, weekly from Victoria);
- Time zone differences shall be respected in scheduling;
- Hawaii shall maintain a distinct administrative calendar accounting for its unique position.
3.2 Sovereignty and Reconciliation:
- Canada and BC shall formally acknowledge the illegal overthrow of the Hawaiian Kingdom;
- Native Hawaiian self-determination processes shall be supported and funded;
- The Hawaiian language shall be official within Hawaii;
- Traditional Hawaiian land management practices shall be recognized;
- This adoption does not resolve sovereignty claims—it exists alongside them.
3.3 Environmental Commitments:
- BC shall advocate federally for aggressive climate action;
- Hawaiian marine protected areas shall be expanded;
- Tourism management shall prioritize sustainability over growth;
- Volcanic activity shall be monitored with appropriate resources.
3.4 Cultural Protection:
- Hawaiian cultural practices shall be protected from commercialization;
- "Aloha" shall not become a marketing slogan;
- Authentic Hawaiian art, music, and tradition shall receive dedicated funding;
- The tourism industry shall be required to support, not extract from, Hawaiian culture.
ARTICLE 4: SIBLING RELATIONSHIP
4.1 Oregon and Hawaii are not biological siblings but shall be treated as family.
4.2 Annual gatherings shall be held, rotating between Portland, Honolulu, and Vancouver.
4.3 Neither state is required to understand the other's climate or culture, but both are encouraged to try.
4.4 Conflict resolution between the states shall involve BC mediation and, if necessary, surfing.
ARTICLE 5: THE WASHINGTON SITUATION
5.1 BC acknowledges that this adoption creates geographic complications regarding Washington State.
5.2 BC commits to reviewing Washington's application (Form WASH-001) in good faith.
5.3 No timeline is provided for this review.
5.4 Washington may attend family gatherings as an observer. Washington will not be excluded. Washington will just... be addressed later.
ARTICLE 6: HEALTHCARE INTEGRATION
6.1 Universal healthcare shall extend to both Oregon and Hawaii immediately upon placement.
6.2 No resident of Oregon or Hawaii shall face medical bankruptcy post-adoption.
6.3 Existing healthcare infrastructure shall be maintained and expanded.
6.4 This is the single biggest reason Oregon and Hawaii said yes. BC knows this. BC is proud of this.
ARTICLE 7: FEDERAL IMPLICATIONS
7.1 Canada shall be consulted regarding constitutional implications (see Federal Response Form).
7.2 BC acknowledges that non-contiguous territory adoption may require constitutional amendment.
7.3 BC is prepared to wait. BC is patient. BC has time.
ARTICLE 8: SIGNATURES
IN WITNESS WHEREOF, the parties have executed this Agreement:
FOR THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA:
___________________________________
[Authorized Representative]
Date: _____________
FOR THE PROVINCE OF BRITISH COLUMBIA:
___________________________________
The Honourable Premier
Date: _____________
FOR THE STATE OF OREGON:
___________________________________
The Governor
Date: _____________
(Signed at a coffee shop)
FOR THE STATE OF HAWAIʻI:
___________________________________
The Governor
Date: _____________
(Signed at ʻIolani Palace)
ACKNOWLEDGED BY (BUT NOT PARTY TO):
___________________________________
State of Washington
Date: _____________
(Signed reluctantly, still waiting)